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The lamest villain just got lamer

The Lamest Villain in Naruto just got Lamer. Why am I still reading this?

So in case anyone didn’t know, I used to follow shounen manga alot. Last summer I wrote a post about how I had given up on One Piece, Bleach and Hunter X Hunter, and that Naruto was the last long-running series I still gave a damn about.

Well, after a long but still fairly neat sequence with Jiraiya, Kishimoto seems to have decided it’s time to finally wrap up that messy subplot involving the lame main character Sasuke’s conflict with the even lamer villain Itachi. In other words, we’re finally getting to the point we’ve all been waiting for: one of the two most annoying characters in Naruto is gonna die. Or so we hope.

Itachi is one character that I have never understood the popularity of. Up until this chapter, he’s only excelled in precisely two places: the dullness of his character and the annoyingness of his fanbase. As a character that literally only existed until this point as the one source of motivation in Sasuke’s miserable excuse for living (and having that one point of motivation is what makes Sasuke less lame than Itachi) it would have been nice to understand just what makes the loser tick.

Well, we’ve found out. And it doesn’t make him any less lame. In fact, he is now at a level of fail that might even come close to Dragonaut’s Kazuki.

Itachi’s whole motivation is this: The current big bad, Madara, is a really powerful immortal Uchiha who discovered that stealing other Sharingan prevents the nasty issue of blindness that crops up as a side effect to near omnipotence granted by the game-breaking Mangekyou technique. However, Itachi doesn’t like Madara, and wants to kill him, but to do that, he needs to steal the eyes of his brother Sasuke once they’ve developed sufficiently so that he can fight Madara on the same level. In order to do this, he has been internalizing a really psychotic Id while making his brother’s life a living hell so that he’ll get emo and bitchy enough to kill his best friend so he’ll get the awesome eyes, which will be then ripe for plucking.

Yes. Itachi’s big evil plan, his reason for killing his entire family and joining the big bad’s evil group, was so that he could steal Sasuke’s eyes.

LAMEST. VILLAIN. EVER.

This had better end with Itachi dying and, if Sasuke doesn’t die, he needs to rip Itachi’s eyes from his skull doing a merry dance saying “look at me I’ve got magic powers now!” That’d keep me reading after this.